There’s a saying in Australia when you go walk-about in the desert, that in order to find one’s self you need to lose yourself first. As most of you know over the past 2 years, since the break up of my 15 year relationship, I have been on an intense journey to find myself, reconnect to myself, redefine who I am and recreate and re-dream a new life for myself.
I have been wandering around in my own inner desert, lost…completely. I have, day by day, week by week, slowly found my way back to myself. I have managed to do this through the magic I have had reflected back to me through the amazing people I have met and the openness I have had to receive the lesson or message each person has had for me.
This week I have found myself packing and preparing for a journey like no other I have gone on before. I am generally a fearless traveler finding myself flying or driving off to random locations on a whim and with out a flinch. This current journey has already proven to be profound and testing. I’m destined for Black Rock City, Nevada, the location of the Burning Man Project. I feel like I am traveling to a different dimension. I know I have been meditating and doing inner travels for the past 15 years so you would think a bit of inter-dimensional travel would be a cinch too, but this is different.
I am a person who works with the energies directly around me, gaining instant feedback from what I put out there. Using the techniques and teachings on the path of the Spiritual Warrior, I navigate and choose the light through trust and co-creation. After my experience of profound learning through a freaking painful experience, I have decided to focus of ways to grow from positive experiences.
I met a wise man about three years ago who said to me, “Girl you know what your problem is?” I listened half distracted like, “Oh yeah…try me..” He said very matter of fact,”You need a bigger game. If you don’t create one, you will attract one.” I laughed and made some excuse about needing to complete the tasks at hand. 4 months later my love and life partner of 15 years walked out on me, no reason, no opportunity to change or negotiate, just poof!
Talk about a bigger game, holy smokes did I have to step up! I learnt so much about how to be in this world, and how spiritually arrogant I had been and how I had actually stopped seeking. I was freaking humbled.
In hindsight now I see what he saw in me, the wise man, he saw me accepting less for myself and not shining my light to my full potential, he saw I had stopped. So one of my lessons I learnt is never stop growing or seeking growth, never…and so it’s with this energizing intention that I venture forth into my life now.
It’s through life experiences that we learn and grow spiritually and I am now choosing to create positive learning ‘games’ in my life…totally to avoid life bringing the painful one’s to me to learn and shake me from my trance. I call it ‘chasing the light.’
Even just last Sunday I was reminded by another wise teacher in my life. A guy just doing his thing, but to me a teacher reflecting to me deeper levels of my journey. He called out, “Let Go.. Bianca, Let go…” And subtly that spoke to me in more than my hands to which he was referring, it was a ‘source code’ moment. I will write about my definitions of the source code another time. But needless to say; we’re all connected.
The power of intention is, well, powerful, and the creators of the Burning Man project and all the participants over the years have established a flow which I am about to take a ride on. Like everything, experiences start with choices. Mine started when I choose to go to Black Rock City this year. The theme for this year is Rites Of Passage. And to honor the great creation of my life and the expansive nature of life and Spirit, I think is an amazing opportunity for me to mark my new life and celebrate the magic and wonder of this strange world we live in.
So here’s to getting lost and being found…
Who is Bianca Rothschild? The new Bianca?
I don’t know about you, but I can’t wait to find out…